trust –noun (Dictionary.com)
1. reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.
3. confidence in the certainty of future payment for property or goods received; credit: to sell merchandise on trust.
4. a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is my trust.
5. the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.
6. the obligation or responsibility imposed on a person in whom confidence or authority is placed: a position of trust.
7. charge, custody, or care: to leave valuables in someone’s trust.
8. something committed or entrusted to one’s care for use or safekeeping, as an office, duty, or the like; responsibility; charge.
This year I turn 30 and within the last few months I have come the realization that trust is a big word. I have put so much trust in “man” that I’m not sure what is right or wrong…up or down! This has become a sever problem in my life.
I thought that I was headed in the right direction, but… You let that person into your life who you think has your best interest at heart and he/she let’s you down. Everything that you thought was good for you isn’t…this act turns your WHOLE world upside down. <— this is me at this moment!
I remember another time in my life when I cut my hair to go natural, 11 years ago. This is when I realized that the “friends” in my life were not really my friends. I felt sooooo betrayed! This is also when I began my traveling adventures because I felt like I needed to get away from it all. Every single weekend I was not at home. My parents knew that something was up, but they let me try to “find and discover” myself.
I thought the journey was over when I graduated from college, but it was JUST the beginning! More issues arose…of course it included friendship but now church/religion was becoming a problem. I NEVER stopped believing, it’s just that I had doubts that the Lord really loved me like He said he did. This is the moment that I cut off all my hair AGAIN and started a Spiritual Journey. I began dreadlocks.
When I started my dreads my mother cried big time! LOL You see my Mum is an old school Jamaican who thought having dreadlocks was not right! LOL LOL But that quickly passed when I explained what I was doing and why. My Mum was in my corner the ENTIRE time…loving me, praying for me, and talking to me.
Now…my Spiritual Journey is still ongoing and my eyes are open to the situations around me, but it is times like these when something slips through the cracks and shakes the foundation a bit.
What am I going to do?!? Well, for starters I am starting Book 2 of 40 Days- Prayer and Devotion by Dennis Smith. When I did the first book I was amazed at home much I learned about myself and the Lord. Now to be honest with you I have mess up BIG time and I need to make some serious changes! This is where my trust issues come into play.
I know that I must put some trust in people, but I should not be naive. And THAT my readers is just what I will do!
“Stop trusting in man, who has but a breath in his nostrils. Of what account is he?” (Isaiah 2:22)
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do and He will direct your paths.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
Peace Love and Sooooooul!
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